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Post by valderra on Jun 9, 2005 7:00:32 GMT -5
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God...
"Lord, I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedic snake, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.
"Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you."
"What's a 'man', Lord?"
"This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to empathise or listen to you properly. All in all, he'll give you a hard time. But, he'll be bigger, faster and more muscular than you. He'll also need your advice to think properly. He'll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball about, hunting fleet-footed ruminants, and not altogether bad in the sack."
"Sounds great," says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow.
"Yeah, well... He's better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick. But, you can have him on one condition."
"What's that, Lord?"
"You'll have to let him believe that I made him first." ;D
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Moreta
Admiral
Squirrel Extraordinaire
Ickle Squiggle
Posts: 1,618
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Post by Moreta on Jun 9, 2005 16:51:31 GMT -5
Hehehe... heard it before but it makes me smile every time ;D And of course, we all know that it is so obviously how it really happened as well ;D
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Phenom
Lieutenant
The fiery blood of my ancestry burns pure in my veins.
Posts: 173
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Post by Phenom on Jun 14, 2005 0:42:55 GMT -5
Haha... Now if there is only a way to disprove this...
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ConqueringWolf
Admiral
Merry Meet And Merry Part, Until We Merry Meet Again!
Posts: 5,461
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Post by ConqueringWolf on Jun 14, 2005 9:57:02 GMT -5
This is the proper story....
One day, after nearly an eternity in the Garden of Eden, Adam dials up God and says; "Lord, I have a problem"
"What's the problem, Adam?" God replies.
"Lord, I know you created me and have provided for me and surrounded me with this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Adam?", comes the reply from the heavens.
"Lord, I know that you created this place for me, with all this lovely food and all of the beautiful animals, but I'm lonely." "The sheep and I do not speak the same language."
"Well Adam, in that case I have the perfect solution. I shall create a WOMAN for you"
"Forgive me, Lord, but what is a WOMAN?"
"This WOMAN will be the most intelligent, sensitive, caring and beautiful creature I have ever created. She will be so intelligent that she can figure out what you want before you want it. She will be so sensitive and caring that she will know your every mood and how to make you happy. Her beauty will rival that of the heavens and earth. She will unquestioningly care for your every need and desire. She will be the perfect companion for you." Replies the heavenly voice.
"Sounds great to me." says Adam.
"She will be great, as is with all things I create, well except for the Platypus, but Adam.........."
"Yes Lord."
"This is going to cost you."
"How much will this WOMAN cost me Lord?" Adam replies.
"She'll cost you your right arm,..... your right leg,..... an eye and an ear,... and........... your left testicle."
Adam ponders this for some time. Then with a look of deep though and concern still etched on his face Adam says, "Ehhhh, what can I get for a rib?"
;D ;D ;D
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Post by valderra on Jun 14, 2005 9:59:37 GMT -5
LOL That was funny, Wolf. I didn't know this version. ;D
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Nightcrawler
Admiral
Sadistic Maverick
Me, blue? Impossible...
Posts: 1,062
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Post by Nightcrawler on Jun 15, 2005 1:22:25 GMT -5
Good stuff.
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syborg
Lt Commander
Posts: 382
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Post by syborg on Jun 26, 2005 10:33:13 GMT -5
Lorena Bobbitt probably was Eve
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Post by Wolf Master on Jun 27, 2005 2:15:41 GMT -5
lmao awesome stories
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richard
Cadet
Name in Egyptian hieroglyphics
Posts: 21
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Post by richard on Jun 27, 2005 15:50:56 GMT -5
like both thanks for sharing rich
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0 of 0
Admiral
Temporal Borg
Posts: 1,852
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Post by 0 of 0 on Jul 23, 2006 14:46:38 GMT -5
These were funny I like the two points of view!!!
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